EMOTION ADDICTION:

Emotions are basically feelings of the mind.  There are an innumerable amount of emotions that exist, each more complex than the other. The following is a tentative list: Love, Anger, Enjoyment, Fear, Sadness, Surprise! Disgust, Shame, Excitement, Boredom, and Optimism.  Some are neutral but most fall into categories of positive or negative.

Emotions play an important role in our lives. They are a life-force that can be a springboard to take initiative and can give us the drive, momentum, and desire to take action. Emotions can motivate us, give meaning and emphasis to our words, and help us identify how we FEEL.

FEEL is the key word. Emotions are sensations! Most emotions create a feeling in the body and the more powerful the circumstance the bigger the sensation will be.

I am not a licensed psychologist nor am I a medical authority – but this is what I believe:

The world is full of emotion addicts.

As with all sensations there is a risk of dependency. Anger can produce a rush of adrenaline and can give some people a sense of passion. Fear can have a resonant affect while producing a large dose of anxiety. Memories also induce powerful emotions that, if not regulated, can lead to emotional enslavement. The power of resentment can cause people to latch onto negative feelings for years as it continues to affect them over and over again. (For more on this topic please read RESENTMENT AND FORGIVENESS)

We cannot fully understand the troubles in other people’s lives and we must never minimize their pain, however, some people who feel terrible emotional distress - to the point where they self-mutilate – can also be hooked on that pleasure. The twisted and misunderstood practice of cutting and burning oneself actually releases endorphins in the brain - the same chemical released when we eat and during exercise and sex.

While those feelings can lead to confusion and make life a hot mess, emotions aren't all BAD:

Empathy or sympathizing with others pain can also send an emotional charge through the body. Bodybuilders and sports enthusiasts may experience the power of triumph when they break barriers or score points. Even a researcher in a science lab will experience a jolt of ecstasy when there are positive results. Simply speaking to another, face to face, releases dopamine in the brain and feels pleasurable. This is one of the many reasons why it is so important to be socially active.

But emotions and feelings are EVERYWHERE. They are so prevalent and it is certainly possible to get hooked. Below are all examples of how media outlets target our emotions. By changing how we feel they can influence how we think, what we want, and how we present ourselves. Big organizations understand this emotion addiction phenomenon and look to capitalize on it.

Emotion in the Media:

Music: Music is beautiful – I’m not even going to try to explain it. Music can be powerful because it can also have a resonant effect on the listener. Piano and violin are actually known for their emotional side-effects and the strong bass of a drum can be felt pulsating through the body.  A performer who bellows in a rage onstage is undoubtedly hooked on those emotions and knows his listeners… By sharing in the sorrow of a prolific poet or songwriter one can latch onto those emotions and feel the same way.

Movies: Movies are similar to music only more extreme because they offer an audio-visual-emotional experience. The action, the suspense, the sex, the thrill of a horror flick, along with the fast pace, bright lights, loud and heart tugging music is enough to give any emotion addict their fix.

News: As a business journalist, I’ve experienced this firsthand: Most news today is sensationalized and headlines and stories MUST be captivating! With so many news outlets, there is competition for readers and the one with the most eye-catching headline wins.

News outlets that cover breaking news work with any lead they can get. Unfortunately, because of the pace of their publication, some focus more on the emotional effect of their story and put little emphasis on content. Most news agencies also have agendas and write what they want you to feel, giving them tremendous emotional clout on their readers. Other news outlets love drama. They take serious political issues and portray them as if they took place on a playground while they instigate fights, rabble-rouse, spread propaganda, and fuel the fires of chaos throughout the world.

Advertisement and Marketing: This is a big one. Most ads focus on influencing your emotions so that you will buy a product. Car sales, insurance, political ads, fast food, beer, sponsor a child for a penny a day… It’s not very difficult to spot out.

The aforementioned are all examples of UNNECESSARY emotions. My goal isn’t to persuade the reader to discontinue all association with the media, but to help them recognize their influence. Have you ever cried from a movie, song, or article? Have you ever felt compelled to think, feel, speak, or act a certain way that isn’t you?   

Emotion addiction is a problem because it can decrease happiness. Emotions are EVERYWHERE; if not from outside stimuli it will come from within. There is no escaping it but we must not expose ourselves to unnecessary emotions that can affect our mental health, personalities, and quality of life. There is a big difference between feeling good and being happy and we must not confuse the two and get caught in the trap of relying on strong emotions and feelings for our well-being.

Emotions are tools that are extremely powerful and valuable, but to live a productive life we must take the tools we have and build something for ourselves.  Just as a carpenter wouldn’t sit in a rocking-chair and twiddle his hammer in his hands, we cannot sit idly and allow the electrical current of emotion to rush through our systems. Our energies are too valuable to waste on sensationalism and drama.

As I sat down to write this I realized that it may seem as if I am trying to “debunk” life. (“Maybe we should all live in the caves of the Himalayas so as not to drown in the heavy waters of emotion that are EVERYWHERE,” I mused) That is in no way my intention. But I do believe that it is important to recognize that this phenomenon does exist. We must not get sucked into our emotions (and outside emotions) - that will only zap our energy and leave us disillusioned. We need to be cautious as we dance with the influential emotions that surround us all...

I guess if you WOULD choose to get addicted to emotions, at least get hooked on the good ones :D

I LOVE YOU ALL.

SWEET DREAMS

“Don’t let your Dreams be dreams.” – Jack Johnson

I have crazy dreams when I sleep. Whether it’s a beautiful excursion, a chaotic stream of distorted memory, or a terrifying nightmare, my dreams are intense and (feel) very real. It is amazing because I can feel sensations and emotions in my dreams. I can think, speak, and feel like I am excerting myself with real human activity. Sometimes, I have to collect myself when I awake because I’m confused. “What the hell just happened – how did I get HERE?”

Personally, I am fascinated with dreams. After reading some captivating books I became interested in lucid dreaming, but it was short lived. I was terribly inconsistent in practicing the techniques and the whole idea seemed very spooky, but I did manage to catch a glimpse into the art of dream travel. I remember one dream where I was very aware and felt connected with my personality. It then struck me that I was dreaming and I consciously exclaimed “Hey! I’m dreaming!” I then tried to slap and pinch my leg (something I learned from pop-culture) but since I felt the pain, I assumed that I was NOT dreaming. Thinking this must be my reality, I continued “living” in my dream (albeit a little dazed) while trying to figure out where I was and what exactly was going on. I remember waking up and laughing at my incompetence.

So I dropped the idea. I can’t imagine myself mastering lucid dreaming. I mean, forget living in my dreams – I can’t figure out what to do with myself during waking life!

Whatever the lifestyle or belief system, one cannot deny the inability to explain the crazy brain adventures we have when we sleep.

So what is it about our dreams? What makes us dream when we sleep? Do others dream of us when we dream of them? Do dreams take place in an alternate reality/world that we enter when we sleep or is it simply the creation of a powerful imagination?

I HAVE NO IDEA.

Dreams have forever been a mystery. Throughout history, many psychologists, philosophers, and theologians have theorized about dreaming but, to this day, no DEFINITE answer has been given to explain the brain’s phenomenon during sleep.

Certain factors can influence dreams. Food (specifically fatty foods and dairy) before bed, drugs and alcohol, and grueling schedules or high stress, even hormonal changes in the body can cause vivid dreams, but for the most part it is unexplained. It is truly a wonder.

My experiences intrigued me so I asked a handful of psychologists and thinkers what their thoughts were about dreams. Through their theories I have come up with possible explanations:

1) Just as we have extraneous, wacky, cruel, perverse thoughts throughout the day, it also happens at night. The brain never stops working and things are running through our sleep. Because the rest of the body is inactive, the brain is super-active and these thoughts cause bigger and very real sensations.

2) The subconscious mind seeps out during sleep. If our deepest needs, fears, and other thoughts are not properly expressed or suppressed, the subconscious will expose them during sleep.

So express yourself, get it out! Talk to a friend or yourself. Write it out down or paint it in a picture or play it in a song. Whatever your personal form of expression is – do it. It is terribly unhealthy and counterproductive to keep thoughts and feelings and fears suppressed inside.

I was always told not to take my dreams too seriously. I believe that we should focus more on our REAL dreams; the aspirations and goals in life that give us direction and keep us driven. The dreams that give our lives meaning and focus.

Either way, SWEET DREAMS :D 

We are small but POWERFUL; powerful yet not in CHARGE. While we cannot control the ACTIONS of others, we are responsible for our REACTIONS :D

Gone with the Wind

“Anyway the wind blows

Is-a fine with me

Anyway the wind blows

It don't matter to me”

-Frank Zappa

Life flows like the wind. Sometimes, the wind is blowing behind you, hitting your back, and you are literally being pushed forward. Everything you do is effortlessly done in harmony, almost as if you are in tune with the Universe and all its forces are on your side. You socialize with finesse and your movements are like a prowling leopard. You feel bold and radiant. You think clearly and have rhythm. You’re on point, on your game.

Sometimes, the wind switches direction. The wind blows TOWARD you and everything changes. Mundane tasks become difficult and you are sluggish. You choke on your words and trip over your feet. You lack confidence and grace. You don’t feel that you are maximizing your potential and it’s frustrating. Kind of like walking home in a strong wind, you feel the resistance. It’s as if life is rejecting your very movements.       

Sometimes, a big gust comes, unexpectedly, and blows you off track.

The cycles in life, much like the real weather forecast, is a mystery of life. One could theorize that it is because you did something wrong. Maybe it was something you ate or drank (or didn’t drink – like WATER!) or something you smoked… Perhaps some guilty feelings are distracting you. Maybe you’re tired. Maybe you just have a lot going on in life!

You must understand that it is in no way because you lack the capabilities to live a productive and prosperous life. There are many many factors that play pivotal roles in how we live our lives. Things like the weather, proper nutrition, stress, moods of loved ones, and the attitudes and vibrations of those around us can be extremely influential. They do not dictate our lives but they can certainly have an impact.

Just do your best. Always do your best – then you have nothing to regret. When you try your best, under grueling circumstances, you build immunity to those conditions. (For more on this concept please read POSITIVE CALLOUS)

It’s growth. It’s all about growth.

So keep on truckin’   

Small Under the Sky:

Photo Credit: Sparks of David Photography

It all happened on the night of May 11. It was the night of my birthday and a large group of about 15 people, including me and my friends, were all camped high up in the mountains of northern Israel. Another person in the group, who I had never met before, also had their birthday that night and we celebrated with a double birthday party. We didn’t all know each other but a huge bonfire gathered us together as we got into the birthday spirit. Drinks were poured and stories were told. We laughed and sang and horsed around, all without a care in the world. I really enjoyed myself and I appreciated the presence of my friends and the others around me. 

At some point, I approached the other person who was also celebrating their birthday that night. Already having something in common, we had a nice conversation and soon delved deep into each others lives. We recognized many similarities in our families, interests, personalities, and journeys. I was fascinated by the striking similarities that were apparent in our lives. The fact that we were born on the same day enthralled me and the irony that we had met, under these circumstances, intrigued me even more. How is it that two people, born on the same day, could have so many resemblances?

I started to think that it was all part of some cosmic happening, some orderly constellation. It was spooky and mysteriously thrilling. I glanced up at the stars in bewilderment. If something between two small specks of “dust in the wind” could be so cool, then what about the complexities in the universe at large? 

I felt small.

When the fire died down, my friends and I got our sleeping bags and set them in the grass to gaze at the stars. It was a clear night and the sight of looking up at the stars, on a secluded mountaintop, was awe-inspiring. Deep in thought, I stared up at the beautifully adorned sky and prayed that I would see a shooting star. I witnessed multiple meteors and my heart leapt each time I traced their fiery trails across the sky. I found myself staring into the abyss we call space with my mouth foolishly open. It was jaw-dropping.

Then I saw it. Up, in the cluster of stars, was a formation of 5-7 lights that resembled a “V”. Protruding from the right side of the light formation was a blinking red light. The formation was traveling fast with the red light keeping its pace as if it were attached. It was odd and very chilling. I remembered a documentary I once watched on The History Channel about UFOs. This definitely fit the description. 

“Hey guys, I just saw a UFO!!” I yelled excitedly. We all had a nice laugh when I couldn’t point it out to them because I had lost sight of it. I told them what I saw and explained that it was probably some sophisticated military technology; A quiet drone or some other warfare. After all, we were in the middle-east, a very hostile environment, and Israel is known to have one of the strongest, most advanced, Air-Forces in the world. 

Again, I felt small.

There was clearly something way over my head. There were secrets of men and women more powerful and knowledgeable than myself, the many mysteries of politics, science and religion, and unanswered questions from centuries ago. Add that to the unexplainable frenzies of my personal life and it’s enough to silence anyone. I felt minimized, ignorant, and insignificant. A classic case of ego-death.

We've all felt this way before. That our efforts will never be enough; we just don’t have what it takes. So many are bigger and better than us, why should we even try?

We must all realize that we are unique. There is nobody on the planet that has the same combination of physical features, thought processes, experiences, talents, desires, values, and creativity as we do. Nobody is exactly like us. We can offer our fresh output and that is cause for celebration.

Our thoughts and ideas ARE important. People CAN be affected by our actions and they ARE interested in what we have to say. The world needs our talents! Our friends, family, and acquaintances CAN benefit from our feedback and constructive critique. They need our care and affection. They need our love.

An automobile is compiled of many different parts, that when united and working properly, turn a chaotic piece of machinery into a powerful and productive apparatus. If one part is missing or faulty it is simply a box of steel. Every part is important. 

The same is true for us. Our energies are needed for the harmony of the universe and we are all of great importance. If one of us was missing or malfunctioning, things just wouldn’t be the same.

We can make the world a better place and it all starts with us. Never underestimate how valuable you are!